When I was 31, my husband and I picked up and moved across the country from Los Angeles to New York. The change was much-needed, but it was a strange time to move. We had an entire life in California. Jobs, a perfectly comfortable place to live, and mainly, friends.
We had a whole group of friends. It was our "crew." We always had plans on weekends, places to go for holidays, and generally, stuff to do. After living in New York for a year and half, of course, we've made friends. But we haven't made friends. No longer do we have set plans for Saturday nights, or another apartment that we spend boatloads of time at. We have people we go out for brunch or dinner with, and people we occasionally have a couple glasses of wine with.
But that's all about to change. 'Cause we've got a baby on the way. And everybody knows that babies come with all sorts of perks -- including being great bait for making friends.
See, when we moved to New York, we were too old to do a lot of the things our newfound friends did. At least on a regular basis. We were over 30, and to be honest, both had pasts with enough debauchery to fill two lifetimes. We were over the late night bar scene. But we weren't at the point where we could be yucking it up with parents at the park on a warm summer evening. Because we didn't have any kids. But, in a few short months, that's all about to change. At least, that's what we're hoping for. And, hey, did you know that babies aren't only the perfect bait for making friends, they're great for these four other things, also?
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They're the perfect excuse. Dreading having dinner with so-and-so? Really don't feel like going to your in-laws'? Use the baby as an excuse. To be honest, I feel like I'm getting away with a hell of a lot more -- unintentionally -- just by being pregnant. The possibilities with a child are endless.
They get you more sympathy. Everybod-- okay, most people feel for moms. Especially working moms. If you say you're tired, it's probably for good reason and will be met with a genuine, "Aw, really?" And you know what? It's nice to have complaints taken seriously once in a while.
They get you out of chores. At least I'm hoping they do. Every time I go to my dad's for dinner or a barbecue or whatever, I swear, I wind up doing the majority of the cleaning. And it's annoying, because it's not even my house. Once I have my baby, I'll just scoop her up and be like, "Ooh, sorry, my hands are kind of full right now."
They let you cut lines. Save for the people in New York City, what person in their right mind would allow a woman with a baby or small child to wait in line to use the restroom like the rest of the world? You'd have to be crazy. So, to the front of the line it is, ladies.
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Of course, there are other, non-selfish reasons having a baby will be great. But, I'm not gonna lie, I'm pretty excited about my new potential friends. I'm hoping we'll all go on, like, a really fun trip or something next summer.
Did you make new friends after having a baby?
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